When X-Men First Class came out, I was thrilled to view a new entry into a franchise that I love. Although quality had dipped with the last two films (well, just about dropped off completely with XMO: Wolverine), I still enjoyed them and never expected them to be left out of the film canon. Thusly, I was quite surprised to find that these two films had been cast away; what's that you say? Both bald and hairy walking Xaviers? Emma Frost, again but older in a previous time period and better but still not accurate? It seemed there were a million inconsistencies nagging at me, because I like a good, epic story that travels over the course of many years (my favorite book ever is One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez). I watch Star Wars from episodes 1 to 6, every time. I have a 2 year old son, and I'd like to think that when he is 5, I can show him these massive, winding epic fantasies that could go anywhere and still make perfect sense. It required a bit of stretching as this timeline inexplicably jaunts from 1963 to in, "The near future," but here is how I learned to stop worrying and survive the prequels. [It should be noted that I will not be filling in any gaps with direct comic know-it-all (like Saying Azazel is the son of the Devil and continuity shifted when his portal was disrupted so the timeline changed)].
In XMO: Wolverine, its been 6 years since Logan was in a black ops unit, and an unknown but seemingly brief amount of time since he battled for his brother's right to rape in the vietnam war (latest that could be: 1975), when he rescues a young Cyclops, Emma Frost, and Banshee (kid w/ red hair who was forced to wear a chastity belt over his mouth). A walking, cue ball-esque Xavier then transports the kids to his school via the Blackbird, or X-Jet, whatever they call it, and they fly away to what everyone obviously thought was going to be X-Men First Class, until everyone realized XMO: Wolverine was an abortion and tried to distance themselves from it as far as possible.
In the 1963 First Class universe, we had already seen an (at youngest 10 year old) Cyclops, and he's definitely not over 20 in Wolverine, so we have to assume that time in general is frakked in this universe. If the mutant X gene can make someone super smart (Beast), perhaps technology, fashion and cultured advanced more rapidly in this universe as well. But how could Professor X walk? He's beaming thoughts into Cyclops' head in this scene, and since he's supposed to be crippled at this point, we can only assume that the Professor is not actually there and is in fact telepathically beaming an image of himself to the refugee mutants (thats why his face is so poorly CG'd too, duhhh).
Why did Prof. X have to introduce himself to Cyclops (Scott Summers) if Havok (Alex Summers) was somehow related (in the comics their brothers with Scott as the older, but we can assume the age difference has been flipped) to him and had been a friend and Student of Prof. X? Well, Havok is kind of a dick, and he's been in solitary confinement since the start of First Class, so he might not have too much contact with his baby brother. As far as Banshee and Emma Frost go in this scene, their names are never actually revealed, so we can assume they're just relatives of the alternate First Class versions of themselves.
Why is Professor X bald? We can assume he's lost his vanity and shaved his head as Beast requested in First Class, because it makes Cerebro easier to use.
In X-Men 1, Prof. X says he was 17 when he first met Magneto, yet in X-Men First Class, Charles has just obtained his Doctorate and is definitely in his late 20's when he meets the future super-villain. However, there is a moment of recognition when Charles comes across Erik's presence in the ocean. Perhaps it was a presence Charles had come across before, maybe when he was 17? I mean, Magneto and Charles are the two most powerful (level 4, although Phoenix was a 5) mutants at this point in time, so you'd probably remember if you passed a really angry mutant on the street and read his thoughts about killing nazis with gold. Works for me.
But why in X1 does Charles tell Logan that the kids call the teachers X-Men, when really in First Class, its Moira McTaggert who came up with the name? Because Charles thinks its a stupid name and that superheroes are cheesy (hence the black ops look), but that still doesn't mean he didn't want Wolverine to think he was cool and join his super hero boy band.
But why does Charles say that Magneto helped him build Cerebro when we see in First Class that Hank built Cerebro?
Hank's was obviously a prototype, and Magneto could've helped build the newer Cerebro during the time of First Class, or, later, as he and Charles didn't leave that story as mortal enemies or anything but as two friends with drastically opposed belief systems. He could've even built it as a favor since, you know, he crippled his best friend and all.
How come Mystique doesn't acknowledge Charles more, since they used to be BFF's? They've grown apart and battled numerous times since then; at the very least, she doesn't kill him when she poisons Cerebro, so that could be read as a subtle gesture of good will. What about Victor Creed in Wolverine and Sabretooth in X1? Well, in each, neither is referred to as the other's name, so Sabretooth could be Victor's bastard child, but I prefer the logic that without Hugh Jackman's effeminate Logan in his life, Victor just let himself go wild, maybe got a little experimented on by Magneto or Striker in the process, and joined a Norweigan Hair Metal band.
Moving onto X2. Nightcrawler: Yep, soon after First Class, Azazel and Mystique got bored, humped each other, had a baby and gave it up for adoption; works for me. Beast (Dr. Hank McCoy) on TV, looking like a normal honky without blue skin? His beastly visage might get better or worse depending on biological factors; or, as a scientist, he never stopped looking for a cure and still has never found a permanent one (I'm not going down that whole holographic projection bit from the comics, I prefer to only have one shape shifter in this universe, especially when something like that would come in so handy on every single mission). Oh, and why has Beast's blue look changed? He's evolving, dummy!
And now we find ourselves at X3, which I do not hate at all, as I find that even in areas where its lacking, there's still enough depth from the two previous films to carry the gravitas of the finale. So we start off with a Walking, bald Prof. X. We hear his footsteps, he needs to open car doors to get out of them, so I'll surmise that this isn't a telepathic projection as I did with the end sequence in Wolverine. Here I'll go with some inspiration from Grant Morrison's run on New X-Men, and say that Magneto is fusing metal into Xavier's spine to keep him upright, just to grant an old friend the opportunity to walk again, if only for a few moments. They don't even have to be on great terms during this. Magneto pledge's no allegiance to Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters in this scene, but is obviously aware of the massive benefits of having Charles help a mutant evolve further both academically and physically. When they bid adieu, Charles goes back to the wheelchair and that's that.
Oh, and can we just make it official that Xavier and Magneto were fucking each other during First Class? Its definitely implied, and the story does need at least one legendary romance. Come on, don't be a prude, its just better that way! All in all, if you're a sane and rational human being, these minor inconsistencies probably don't bother you. But, on the off chance that you're an anal retentive, slightly obsessive compulsive uber-geek like me, I offer you here the slightest shred of peace to your mind. And no, I'm sorry, I don't know how to make X-Men Origins: Wolverine not suck. But I still enjoy it anyway.
Excelsior!
No comments:
Post a Comment